As
mentioned in my last blog entry I had a CT Scan in late October and had a
meeting with my Dr scheduled for yesterday.
I was approaching this appointment with the usual apprehension and had a plan if my results were consistent with other results. That meant that I was looking for an extended
period for the next scan and visit. My
hopes of that were quickly dashed as the Dr informed me that my tumour on my liver
was dangerously close to my bile ducts and he was concerned about Biliary
Dilatation. Not knowing what that meant
he drew a picture of the tumour compressing the bile ducts thus rendering them inoperable. I know that to be serious as I know someone
close to me who is experiencing the repercussions of such a blockage right now.
It is not pretty and it can cause
infection that can make your life very miserable and perhaps lead to death.
With this
information I told my Dr that I had to reconsider my “going-in” position and
asked him for his advice to help me make the decision that had to be made. We explored alternate treatments and rejected
what Dr Jonker explained. I guess I
really knew this would happen one day as my charted CEA scores were starting to
look like a very successful “start-up” when graphed showing and sharp upturn over
the last few months. Fine for a
financial result (actually quite desired) but not so when one recognizes that
this is a measure of the Cancer activity in my body. It was very sobering to see and we finally
decided that I would re-commence my Chemo program as soon as possible. Dr Jonker has been advocating this for some
time and I was resistant to this as my body really did not show and demonstrate
any symptoms. However, the scan tells
the story along with the select blood tests.
Freddi and
I both left the hospital in a state of shock and disappointment. I have been trying to normalize my thinking
since then and that has caused me to feel nauseous and quite concerned about
the short term as we turn left and soldier on.
Deep down I knew it would happen one day but I was certain it would not
be yesterday as I have been feeling very well and have returned to a more
balanced physical and mental approach after dropping the CBD and some other
attempts to preserve this body.
As it
stands right now I am due for Cataract surgery on the 22nd and a
return to QCH for Chemo on Nov 27th followed by few more sessions
every two weeks. Needless to say I am not
looking forward to this as I recall from spring 2017 that my body did not do
well under the attack of Chemotherapy.
But the alternative is equally scary and not something that I am ready
for right now. It is my hope that the
Chemo will stabilize the growth in both my liver and lungs and allow me to
continue to enjoy different parts of my life.
I will keep you informed as I usually am more productive with my blog
and my thoughts when I am forced to slow down and rest more. I have to admit that I have not been doing
that very well over the last 15 months of no Chemo.
So there
you have it. Life goes on in a different
mode and I am trying to be strong about facing this new challenge. Thank you for dropping in and feel free to
comment or send me your individual questions and I will try to answer them.
Be well and
feel the love…..
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